The Celestial Voyager 9/22/2023 11:57pm

Annette Chung

"See? Look at that squirrel. Look at its mouth." "Like its lips? Does a squirrel have lips?" "I mean its jaw. The bottom part of its face. Doesn't it look all purple?" "Well, it's sort of in a shadow. But yeah, it's dark. Maybe from eating berries?" "All the berries are gone or dried up. What if it's some kind of fungus?" "A fungus?" "Yeah, like a zombie fungus. Like it has rabies. Wants to bite us." "...(READ MORE)

Araceli 9/20/2023 9:37pm

Great Mama Two-hands

The Pie Gobbler's eyes were bigger than his plate. Oh he'd eat two dozen pieces a day, from two dozen different pies, with two dozen cups of coffee. But oh such a waste! The Pie Gobbler's house was filled with uneaten pies, pies with just one piece cut out of them, pies just sitting there and attracting flies. It was sad. "Oh Pie Gobbler. Why don't you order just one piece? You can gobble all the pie you want, but you want more pie than you can gobble!" "Leave me alone,"...(READ MORE)

Maryellen-Carter 9/20/2023 4:04pm


Tank and nozzle attachment went off flawlessly. I am En-Route now to ACME....(READ MORE)

Sphinx Nerif 9/15/2023 11:46pm

Megan Virago

DEAR CLIENT: They say you can never step into the same river twice, and that apparently applies to flying through maps backwards! As we were attempting to return to the Laen and continue our delivery of one (1) Nest-Bed to a particular version of Psychic High School, we saw a great city in the distance that was NOT on the map. Even from a great distance the towers of the city were enormous, and as we grew closer their size became unimaginable. They grew larger, and larger... until it beca...(READ MORE)

E.L. Spence 9/13/2023 9:29am

Jerico Soberanis

I formally accept the job as captain of the E.L. Spence and ferryman of strange goods....(READ MORE)

The Mephitis 9/11/2023 9:29pm

Captain Pirate IX

Riding the Waveform is one of the best parts of the job. Not only does it look AMAZING from the inside, but it creates a subtle vibration throughout The Mephitis that is both wonderfully relaxing and stimulating at the same time. Plus, really not much to do during the ride -- no steering, no loading, no unloading. We're out of radio contact for the duration, so no pesky calls or distractions. Nothing to do but keep an eye on the instruments and enjoy the ride. Purple and green auroras spill o...(READ MORE)

The Revelation 9/9/2023 9:17pm

Phoenix Quinn

"Well this has gotta be the smallest island ever," I said. "It can't be an island," Campbell said. "We waked in the same direction the entire time. So it's more like a sphere, and we walked all the way around it and came back around the other side." "But the sun didn't move," said Camy. "So it can't be like a little planet. More like a ring. A tiny ringworld with the sun in the middle." "Sounds like flat earth talk to me," I sa...(READ MORE)

The Eolas Anatolijus 9/7/2023 11:58pm

Julie Cairo, Esq.

After snorfling me quite excessively, the Grub People of this underground realm soon lost interest and returned to their grubbing. My slide down the tunnel involved a minimum of battering, and deposited me on a soft pile of sand in a grand cavern, teaming with Grub People. Vaguely lit by an iridescent fungus clinging to the walls of the massive chamber, these Grub People were much like those in other regions -- white, hairless, and focused on their search for the rich water filled roots that...(READ MORE)

Eyes Without A Face 9/5/2023 11:02pm

Ensign Charmers

I didn't realize that @Claira's little five-legged creature could be such trouble. "What do you call that kind of animal anyway?" I asked. Claira didn't respond, but we were both huffin and puffin chasing that critter around corners and blind alleys. Pretty soon we were quite aways off the promenade, way back behind the High Street. No less busy though. It was like a whole other world. "Weeeeeek! Weeeek weeeeek weeeek weeeek weeeek." There was that ridiculous litt...(READ MORE)

Egregore 9/3/2023 11:57pm

Rose Nomenclature

Mostly, Ocular Space gave me a headache. "Try working with Ocular Space for just a few minutes a day," @Madam Zita said, "then work up to longer periods. Through time your mind will be able to adjust and manifest meaningful psycho-emotional landscapes more easily." I don't generally do "emotional." What I did end up seeing was like a lot of flat shapes. Circles, squares, triangles... different colors, moving around over a kind of grid. "That's a map,&q...(READ MORE)

The Crystal Skull 9/1/2023 6:59pm

Lik McCoy

The guy who owns the Garland Patera doesn’t keep much track of his stock, so it’s easy to walk off with cases of fine wine, cheese, cured meats. Seems fair, considering what he pays me. Then I sell them to the traders who service the settlers and crooks and magicians out in the Madness Zone. Couldn’t pay me to live out there again....(READ MORE)

SMILEYS BASEMENT 8/30/2023 11:03pm

Boss Moss

And I'm the leader! Tough as nails... but if only I knew where I was leading us. But wait! Whasdat uppa head?...(READ MORE)

The Metataxi 8/28/2023 10:09pm

Mrs. Krause

Oh who could it be now? Actually, I'm kidding. Everyone has their time, and my husband and I get to every one, in time. Everyone appreciates a bit of personal service. Which is why it's a dry cleaners -- when there's cultural reference for it. For instance, with the Ne' Breem, no clothes! So instead it's more of spa where they have the silicon barnacles nibbled away. Or the zyyzyyzyyk, inhabiting several superpostions at once, they love reharmonization complexes. For those who know w...(READ MORE)

ol' big balloon 8/26/2023 11:42pm

Flash McCoy

"You just can't do it with less than five. It's gotta be a star," I told the Captain. There wasn't any way out of this mess except telling the Captain everything. He had me to rights, but said he'd let it all slide if we could just call up another pumpkin. "Well then you just get Beans and Mickey and Larissa back here," the Captain said. "And then their parents won't have to get involved either. I suspect they can all make it back by nightfall." I gave it s...(READ MORE)

SS Evergreen 8/24/2023 10:43pm


When you're a third rate mate in the engine room you don't hear much, but the word is we're on the run from some kind of big shot worm cowboy. What'd the captain do, rustle his worms? So the Evergreen is heading off the beaten path, just till things cool off. I'm hoping we make it to a tropical island. I've never been to one, but it was the kind of thing I thought I'd see when I became a merchant airshipman. Seems like I spend most of my time looking at big greasy engines....(READ MORE)

Razorcrest 8/22/2023 11:18pm


after the synchronous inversion festival on apoidea, we all needed a big chill. humboldt and darlene especially so, as their bodies needed a lot of rest after reverting from bee form, and fred and zane were almost completely depleted. funny thing about fred and zane is that even though they're crew, they're cool with us stowing away, and give us bee bumps when they run into us in the deep hold. they know we're down with the bee struggle so we're all on the same side. nik and rik and chik and i o...(READ MORE)

Zap Colonize Epilog 8/20/2023 11:58pm

Sister Elm

Day 14, tracking Tara and the Shizen Baton. The Reedy Way has provided few clues. Wisps of creature fur tangle with the air moss. Repulsive green folk emerge from the muck and taunt us. Sisters Willow and Birch scan the etheric frequencies on their whatchamacallit. Meanwhile, the Zap Colonize Epilog continues across the endless cat tails, searching for the scent....(READ MORE)

The Sadie Hawkins 8/18/2023 10:37am

Jackie Winks

It's hard to breathe up here. Nothing seems as small in the sky as I thought it would....(READ MORE)

Toxic Shipping #4583 8/17/2023 11:59pm

Dillon Cone

Dear Zephyr Air Transport, Our replacement shipment of E.D.D arrived, and we have found the additional quantity delivered to be insufficient recompense for our earlier misshipment. However, we found @Hazmat Matt to be supremely entertaining in his regenerative ragdoll form. While his head is still enormously large for his underdeveloped body, he has mastered the ability to move quite naturally and perform nimble dances, much to the amusement and delight of the staff at Compound #8295, who...(READ MORE)

Steampunk to hell 8/15/2023 11:23pm

Luz Dunkel

@Jonesy Morgan was really getting on my nerves. Obviously a made up name for a pirate, dressed like a cartoon of a pirate, who had a big twiggy nest instead of a pirate ship. "Oooooh arrrrrgh!" @Jonesy Morgan said, just to annoy me. I had no obligation to him OR the ridiculous giant owl who started all this in the first place. I had my Impossibag back and it was time to leave. And ol' Hexy was faithfully waiting for me at the foot of this giant tree, no doubt. Rather than ma...(READ MORE)

Matte Kudasai 8/13/2023 11:55pm

Billy Sabab

Skr Kressa dimmed the lights and a thin screen unrolled itself from the ceiling. AUTOMATIC MANNEQUINS -- EYES ONLY REPORT -- SECTION 27 -- CODENAME BIRDSONG TAPELOOP "Don't worry," Skr Kressa said, "You've been cleared. Next slide." I didn't know who Skr was talking to. The screen changed and showed a black and white picture of a group of people gathered at a street market. "Automatic Mannequins," Skr asked. "Ever run across one?" "Well...(READ MORE)

agro 8/11/2023 11:27pm

Hove Albion

Sure, I felt a little uneasy about eating Sentient Slimes at first. I'd seen the movie about the one the scientist made friends with, and how it built itself a house out of its favorite books and became a cruciverbalist. But when my friends got me drunk enough to try one I was hooked! You should try one too! Don't wait till you're drunk! Sentient Slimes have changed my life. BROUGHT TO YOU BY ZEPHYR QUICK STATION #8861B/A65. ACTORS PRESENTING TESTIMONIALS MAY HAVE BEEN COMPENSATED WITH FREE P...(READ MORE)

No Questions Asked 8/9/2023 11:59pm

Sally McNancy

This furniture gives me a disturbing feeling. I don't know whether to throw up or accept it as some nouvelle ironic chic. Everyone looked monstrous at my party. Disgusting, disturbing creatures. They had a good time, but I'm just not sure that's the kind of party I want to have. @Rebus Wilson can you remind me of the return policy? There was only the one party....(READ MORE)

base 1 8/7/2023 10:02pm

Mickey Fine

And how lucky was I this jacket came with money in the pocket! And in whatever strange currency this world seems to accept? Someone must have come through from this world and left the jacket it that maintenance closet. Which does sort of make me nervous about taking it, if it was “lost and found” then what are the rules exactly? But boy, is it comfortable. Roomy but fits well. And these pockets! It’s like there’s no end to them. Sitting here so debonair in this outdoor cafe sipping...(READ MORE)

The Hartlepool 8/5/2023 11:12pm


Look at those lil cyborgs go!!! the purple LEDs really look great in a firefight, but you've gotta figure it makes them easy to target. amirite? but if nobody's got snipers then... YES! they brought down all the glass YES ALL THE GLASS on the front of the 7-11. BOOYA!! Short burst of concentrated fire at the bottom of each panel. Totally pro. Now look at them going in after those snacks....(READ MORE)

Stratospheric Aerodrome Renoire 8/3/2023 11:39pm

Zephyr Ambulance LTD

The passage through the storm was smoother than I would have guessed. "Helm! Do you have control?" "Yes mam. We've left the weather behind us. And look! The Renoire is still ahead!" And there it was in all its girth, the Stratospheric Aerodrome Renoire floating in the distance ahead, bright in the afternoon sun. "Mam..." said the J.G. Lt., "it was dusk. Just a moment ago. The sun was going down." He was right. These were noonday clouds, sta...(READ MORE)

the Omega project 8/1/2023 9:54pm


What is it like to be a pinstripe and lose your stripes? To be a jacket, deconstructed? What lies within, indeed? Mrs. Krause was kind as she clipped away the remnants and tatters of my old life. How did we finally locate The Great Dry Cleaners? How did we even make it from @smiley's warehouse to this fortunate ship? It's all a blur of traveling jacket hibernation and trans-pattern drift, aided perhaps by the consciousness expanding powers of nano-flavonids. If only @Houndstooth were here...(READ MORE)

Zeppelin Zoologica 7/30/2023 10:35pm

Didel Fidae

Oh, yes! Do come in! Join us! We've heard about you. Taking the grand tour of Captain @weiss' grand menagerie, are you? Well why not join us in a hand? My fellow Impossimen and I were just wishing we had a fourth. Excuse me? You haven't heard of we Impossimen before? Well I suppose we have been camped out on the Zeppelin Zoologica too long if people have forgotten about us already! Am I right, my Impossimen? You just have a seat and I'll get you a drink, and tell you about how we first met...(READ MORE)

Spatuloso 7/28/2023 11:41pm

Lasso Pout

@Soap Lotus and I were squeezed in next to each other, moored in the back yard of the mayor of Paradise. When they heard there were visitors, the citizens figured it was time for a barbecue picnic. They set it up in the mayor's back yard on account of too many trees in the park for Soapy and I to get in close. Soapy's crew might seem pretty "big city" at first glance, but they were happy to pass out cans of beer and pop. Townsfolk set up the card tables and brought a pot luck and pa...(READ MORE)

Moonbeam 7/26/2023 11:31pm

Harry Otter

The rats scampered across he verdant, flower covered hills. "Happy to be on dry land again," I said. "And thirsty as all get out. Plenty of the rats haven't had anything but seawater to drink for days," Big Bulldog said. The Therianthrope was mooring next to the Moonbeam back near the shoreline. Blue sky with some clouds and cool ocean breezes. "Squeeeeee!!!" squealed a group of rats in a copse of trees in the distance. All the other rats raced towards i...(READ MORE)

The Redmane 7/24/2023 10:35pm

Jordan Turner

"Uh... they're all... floating up?" We were watching the landing party from the bridge. They were busy at the altar, and the reindeer started to bellow, and suddenly they just all started... floating straight up. Into the empty space above the big rock we were parked on. "Yeah, I see that. Captain left you in charge." Avery was never much help in a tight spot. We watched their relatively tiny bodies floating up, and they were scrambling around in the air with the...(READ MORE)

The Nimble Shroud 7/22/2023 8:48pm

Lt. Denkt

It was most definitely a clue. "It's a uniform from The Nimble Shroud," said Khlebnikov. "With their captain's name on it," said Dranitsyn. "Someone has dressed these goats in the uniforms of The Nimble Shroud?" I said. Looking over the flock of goats, a number of them were kitted out in the drab olive green of merchant airshipfolk. "But it don't fit so well," said Khlebnikov. "Actually it fits too well," said Dranitsyn. Dranit...(READ MORE)

USS Imperative 7/20/2023 11:12pm

Barnaby Winklestein

Where's that young First Engineer's Mate? Zwiffy I believe? Ah there you are my lad! Oooooo and what's all this Mezmo oozing all over the floor? Ha ha! Not to worry. Let's have a look at that ritinculator... just stand back while I put my finger by my nose and give a nod and.... up Up UP!...(READ MORE)

Minecraft is the best 7/18/2023 11:10pm

Roberto Shelton

I was having trouble keeping it straight in my head. "You've had the spare parts for the Reality Generators all along?" I asked. We were headed down the mahogany halls to the cargo hold. There was a strange hum. "Not 'all along,' exactly," Puppy Grande said. "We assumed them." "And when you assume?" I asked. "Ha ha. Under Dimensional Reality Physics it's not possible to say if we pre-existed the event or not, but the original Minecraft...(READ MORE)

WonderFly9000 7/16/2023 9:05pm

Milt McGee

Tom and his band of mountain cat commandos made good crew. They were well disciplined, came well supplied with their own rations. and took up just about as much space and weight as a full load of milk bottles, so the WonderFly9000 wasn't too overburdened. They were freebooters, and Tom had fallen into a windfall he'd never dreamed could come true. I explained the plan in detail. "You're just putting me on," he asked over the eastern edges of the hinterlands. "No, I'm afra...(READ MORE)

Microwave Explosion 7/14/2023 11:56pm

Larry Fantasio

I'd certainly seen better salad bars. "Pan-Handler's has specials," Black Hermione's wooden head said from inside my man-purse. What they lacked in fresh microgreens was made up for by the range of more classic ingredients. Beets, garbanzos, a tuna niçoise. But what were these specials? "WAITER!" Black Hermione screeched from her bag. The @Queen of the Hudson shuddered. The waiter wasn't a man. And dressed in nothing more official than a Pan-Handler's brand apron...(READ MORE)

The Flying Comrade 7/12/2023 10:59pm

Ben Tater

The Parsnip has an endless film library. Entire filmographies of civilizations I'd never heard of. Which was fine because I couldn't care less. About anything. For the second time and against my will, time had been taken from me. In the blink of an eye the world was two and a half years older. And who knows how many years since I was separated from my crew. All that time taken from me by that little green man. Being near him made time run fast. Made it run right past you. Nothing wa...(READ MORE)

The Useless Precaution 7/10/2023 10:21pm

Count Almaviva

La Precauzione Inutile aveva bisogno di un luogo di riposo, e presto. "Mantieni l'assetto fermo a 38 gradi!" "Mantenere l'assetto fermo", ha chiamato  Minerva DePlume! "Tieni forte il sartiame!" "Tieni stretti i riggins!" chiamato Benefico Sal. "Trattieni la tua lingua sibilante!" "Hisssssssss!" chiamato Le Reptile. E abbiamo portato La Precauzione Inutile sul baldacchino di una foresta senza fine. Per lo più, e...(READ MORE)

Nixxi 7/8/2023 11:56pm


"I'm a 4-hole flat!" the orange button said. It was a big button. Not as big as a plate or anything, but for a button, it was definitely big. What was I to do? The delivery instructions clearly said not to talk ABOUT the big buttons, but now that this button had busted from its "snuggly bed" packaging, I found myself with no choice but to speak TO this big button. "Nice to meet you, 4-hole flat," I said. "Say, it's not quite time for your nap to be ov...(READ MORE)

Liberate Tuteme 7/6/2023 4:29pm

Waylon MacCaa

Captain @Qwicol! Land hoy! Granted I can't say what land it might be, but land it seems. Or the back of an enormous turtle. Hmmm... yes... a very enormous turtle....(READ MORE)

Albion 7/4/2023 9:51am

Adam Sol

I curate the doll parts library on the Albion. When @Florence Twofoot needs a part, she comes down into my part of the hold. Not even the haunted dolls come down this far. "Evening, Adam." "Evening Florence." Florence rummages through the bins... we don't really have great names for all the odds and ends. Screwfoot Hing, Big Ball Little Ball, Septum Rodgerious... we amuse each other with our creative nomenclature. But it makes organizing them a challenge. It's more a...(READ MORE)

Invictus 7/2/2023 9:43pm

Nathan Hill

The waitress led us though the warrens of decks and lifts of the enormous... ship? It was more like a space station. "Oh, it's a ship alright," she said. "And you can call me Marta." "I think I'm going to be sick," First Mate Quiller whispered to me on an especially long elevator ride. "Your head does look sort of... enormously large," I whispered back. "Oh! Do you guys have dramamine?" Marta asked. "I'm sorry. I totally forgot t...(READ MORE)

Thot Slayer 6/28/2023 11:34pm

Henriette - Loretta


Berrysoul 6/26/2023 11:04pm

Mr. Ixnorthorb

Dum dum dum Tear down big doors Dum dum dum "Ixno! We tear down big doors" "Yes Ter! Big doors down we tear!" Dum Dum Dum "Ixno! Friend!" "Ter! Friend!" CRASH! Dum dum dum ... ... "Ixno! Sacred Temple so big inside!" "Ter! Or we so tiny!" "Like tiny humans..." "Humans? Ter, I have secret." "Tell secret safe, Ixno." "I have human in my ear." &q...(READ MORE)

Murder of Crows 6/24/2023 1:33pm

Postie McCharge

Pinecones, eh? Yes they were scattered throughout the small park. And not another soul visiting this particular Pineville attraction. A number of cones still held seeds between their scales. Dreampine nuts! Were they still fresh and viable? I broke one off and put it in my mouth....(READ MORE)

Apollo 6/22/2023 11:43pm

Budgie Pete

Juvenile Common Starling? Ha ha! Easy enough to pass the primitive biometric security of Zephyr Air... I am indeed a fully sentient bird! Even more fully realized than @Lucas Ravenn and hybrids of the like, if you ask me. AND I'VE GOT A LOT TO SAY! On that note, I'm not fully confident in the leadership of @Akora O. We've got Angels in cryogenic storage turning out to be the President and his twin daughters? And Demon Wing Membranes still unaccounted for? It's all bird to do but CROAK...(READ MORE)

spes 6/7/2023 3:07am



Zephyrus 5/27/2023 11:12am


Hi, I have two people available to get these gears for you. Would that be enough? Precautions are a good thing to take....(READ MORE)

USA 4/14/2023 10:24am


I picked up the specified object and dropped it off at the following location: 46°14′06″N 06°02′42″E, 2010...(READ MORE)

e 2/13/2023 2:13pm



smiley's warehouse 2/12/2023 10:10pm


At @Seersucker's request, I went in search of a janitorial station, looking for stain remover. After having no luck in a certain broom and mop closet I noticed one of the ceiling tiles ajar and decided to poke my (borrowed) head in to take a look. Naturally it was quite dark and I couldn't see anything but hints of a framework of metal supports, extending into the darkness like a wild jungle gym at night. But the breeze was fresh and there was a sense of space and openness, and I began to climb....(READ MORE)

SS.youhaveashrimpy 2/6/2023 2:37pm


russia...(READ MORE)

Trade Federation 1/30/2023 9:18am


yes...(READ MORE)

hindenburg 12/14/2022 10:26am

John doe

We set sail for america!...(READ MORE)

Battle Sub 10/11/2022 11:28am


day one lets see how this goes...(READ MORE)

-.-. --- .-. .--. --- .-. .- - .. --- -. ... / -.. 8/26/2022 8:40am


This is my first job & I screw this up it's 'cause I did NOT get ANY training. Also yea, I accept it....(READ MORE)

Deadman's Last Ride 6/8/2022 6:15pm


lost... again... who would have guessed it... we need a job, and one soon... we'll take anything at this point... crew's getting restless and annoyed... this is an... odd... situation......(READ MORE)

The Atlantic Sway 5/15/2022 11:04pm

Dr. Erwin Strand

Subject W114b** Breakthrough Intelligence Sequence Investigation  The aquatic mammal registered as @Northern Right Whale has consistently shown ULTRA MK level mastery of an increasingly sophisticated semiotic result chain and implementations. Graduation to operation Mama Goose has been approved.  The first airship specially scaled for large Earth whales has recently been completed. It is large enough to support a crew of 12 large Earth whales in its aquatic habitat. This “aquarium of...(READ MORE)

Matte Kudasai in a tragically Sad America 5/13/2022 1:04pm


’Ello Maytee! I think I moight be able to help ye with the job, provided I shall be provided with coinage. As you can see, me sweet lady ship goes all the wae from the New World to the easter asian islands, and Me just so happens to be stationed about lil ol Koloszvar. The eye contact thengye won’t pose a roblem, as I robbed meself of sight in order to look kool while rocking the double eye patches. Anywaes, If ye wanna contact me, ye shall send a pigeon up in the sky, with a message and...(READ MORE)

S S Rosemary 5/12/2022 9:20am

Captain M Wood

Fellow Transporters! We at the S S Rosemary are officially taking our first job! We will be delivering black holes in canning jars for our client Chyppe Sol. Our port will be Tamkar-7 in Andromeda, which is a bit out of the way, so we understand if no-one wants to meet us there. Despite the assurances of the job posting, we will be spending a day black hole proofing our ship and ourselves, and we should be able to deliver in 2 earth days. SIgning off Capt M Wood...(READ MORE)

Non Sum Qualis Eram 5/1/2022 11:29pm

Asphodel Meadows

Dear Captain, I am leaving this note pinned to the hatch of the Non Sum Qualis Eram in hopes that you and your crew will discover it upon returning from lunch. I find the canteen at this particular aerodrome to be exceptional, as you no doubt discovered if you ordered their speciality -- grilled cheese and tomato soup! Even if you are not a tomato soup fan I believe you will find it utterly irresistible. I frequently come to this particular aerodrome to judge the measure of the various sh...(READ MORE)

Wait what do I put here? 2/26/2022 2:06am

Shelale M.

Im just an amateur, please be nice to me captain TvT...(READ MORE)

Voyager 7/9/2021 4:49pm


hi...(READ MORE)

sus 6/16/2021 1:51pm


sus among us best yes beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee eeeeeee eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee eeeeeee eeeeeeeeeeee eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee eeeeeeee eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee eeeeeeee eeeeeeeeee eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee eeeeeeeee eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee eeeeeeeee eeeeeeee eeeeeeeeeep rubux robux robux yes yes ye s yeysss death...(READ MORE)

Golden Stone 3/15/2021 7:26pm

Dirac Fermion

Hey has anybody seen my antiparticle? And let me give you a hint it's not my sister Majorana. Anybody can tell she's her OWN antiparticle. She thinks everything is always about her. She's so high energy. AND maintenance. It's ME who has to worry about my antiparticle showing up at any minute, poofing me out of existence. It's why I stowed away here on the Golden Stone. My antiparticle would NEVER think of looking for me h-----...(READ MORE)

Fart Squad 1/7/2021 5:51pm


i fart, it stink, ow stinky hlep.,...(READ MORE)

04 12/14/2020 8:54pm

Officer Fresno

Hullo? tap tap tap Anybody home? Sorry I'm late. There was a paperwork mixup down at the station. Anyway, we had a report of some suspicious activity so we're just following up. Anybody? tap tap tap...(READ MORE)

St. Ableberry 11/22/2020 2:30pm

Pantha Abelberry

It's no problem! I can speak draconic, so the dragons will probably understand! I'll get right to it!...(READ MORE)

Battle Bus 11/18/2020 10:53pm

Pomme Contrebandier

C'est ainsi qu'a commencé notre plus belle vie à l'âge de pierre de l'univers 4A. J'ai trouvé que mon partenaire commercial était un homme changé. L'air frais et l'exercice lui ont fait du bien, sans parler du soleil, que sa peau blanche et pâteuse avait rarement ou jamais vue auparavant. Cela, associé au pain surnaturellement nutritif de l'âge de pierre de l'univers 4A, a donné à mon partenaire autrefois paresseux et obséquieux une nouvelle résilience. Maintenant qu'il a part...(READ MORE)

USS Enterprise 11/16/2020 11:04am

Captain Squirrel Esq

Land, ho! And a yo-ho-ho to you, which is just one yo- away form Santa, with all the Jollyness it brings! We are hereby most honoured to undertake this brave venture, and hand over these here Ancient Shortbreads even more Ancient to the recipient, in five years time! It shall certainly add to the value of the vintage. In the meantime, we shall boldly skedaddle, where no man has skedaddled off to before!...(READ MORE)

Gamer 11/3/2020 9:34am


This job be so fine...(READ MORE)

jdfalf 10/26/2020 3:33am


fff...(READ MORE)

The Warrior13 9/30/2020 12:26pm

Luna R. W.

9/30/2020 I'm so happy to take this job I hope nothing blows up like last time!...(READ MORE)

The Mad-lad Potato 8/14/2020 10:52pm

Roberto Shelton, Jr.

Reality Generation Newsletter -- August Edition Thanks to @Captain Alea Downton and her top-notch crew of singing lasses of the air, reality generation devices were successfully deployed in the Faulkton, Henderson, Wuppertal, Miyazaki, Lyubertsy, Aastaurmond, Chauxhall, and Pastoria City areas. This created the the additional "ooomph" necessary to straighten out the kinks in the Great Trunk, and should keep things running smoothly in this generated reality for some time to come (or...(READ MORE)

The Imaginary Potato 6/8/2020 8:52am

Captain Zarna

My new Mama, from The Mad-lad Potato, gave me a huge box with a below deck and wheel and everything! It’s perfect, and Bun-Bun thinks so too. She also got me this journal. I have to go, dusty musties are attacking the Imaginary Potato! Bye!...(READ MORE)

Skyside 4/21/2020 3:26pm


ill take the job, but only if you kill them too...(READ MORE)

Dragon's Tooth 12/22/2019 11:11pm

Clammy Hamsphere

I've been having trouble convincing my brothers three to get together to watch the new Mermaid Imperium. Back during the hard times, that show really brought us together. But now that we're all rich as kings it's like we've lost what's really important between us. We might all have housekeepers and AI powered bidets, but we've traded it for our humanity. I'm having trouble finding that station again anyway. Can't remember which of the 7,218,198 channels it was. It was some kind of public acc...(READ MORE)

The Rapture 12/1/2019 10:43am


The Rapture left the continent of North America from Patrick’s AFB from Brevard County, Florida, USA, on Sunday, December 1st, 2019 at 1:27 PM EST. At 1:30 PM, several miles off shore, The Rapture activated an experimental device created by Terrazian Futuristics, called “THE WORLD,” causing Earth to appear to slow to almost a complete stop. In reality, The Rapture is going at extreme speeds. The Rapture exited “THE WORLD” at 1:32 PM EST off the coast of Guinea. The airship continued...(READ MORE)

Conquest 10/23/2018 11:57pm


Might be something with the transmission, but somethings going wrong. I don't think anything is getting through. If it is, I really need that job done, but it isn't showing up. I don't think the managers know that I'm kinda stuck. well, help if you can....(READ MORE)

Atlas 10/11/2018 11:39pm

Alex Marleybone

The Resurfacing has been accomplished with hardly a dent to the army. The Desert Arachni were admittedly reluctant to face defeat, and some good men had been lost to the gracious cause. Their deaths were not in vain, however. The breach into the ancient surface had been successful, despite the sacrifice of some beautiful ruins. When witnessing such destruction had reminded me of the previous memories of attending expeditions with my old crew mates, and how we planned months to reach here. Since...(READ MORE)

Ventura 7/23/2018 8:47pm

Olivia Diaz

It's so satisfying to have one's theories proven true. If only there was some way to share it with the people back home! And by home, of course, I mean Earth. We were prepared for this, and had been transmitting data back to HQ up till the very last minute. No doubt the last of it got a bit garbled in some interesting ways, but hopefully they'll find something useful in it. But the fact remains that our theories about the Brane were correct--that by reuniting it with its entangled partn...(READ MORE)

The Savage 5/31/2018 3:20pm

captain ryan

My ship is a savage!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!...(READ MORE)

The Knight Snug 4/29/2018 5:26pm



The Holy Bibbizle 4/29/2018 2:32am

Grape Man Jones

God bless The Holy Bibbizle...(READ MORE)

Coney Island Baby 2/5/2018 8:10pm

Lou Grass

Welcome Aboard!...(READ MORE)

Claudette 2/3/2018 11:18pm

Melinda Artaud

Silver Springs Capital Management was thrilled to have our oversupply of R's, S's, and T's removed from circulation from Orbis Eruditi, but our books show that we still owe the Claudette for the removal. Our attempts at remittance to your Accounts Receivable have gone unanswered. Is there another way we should be paying you? We have 75 capital vowels of various denominations still awaiting your acceptance on our docks, and are ready to send them to any accredited grapheme logography of your choo...(READ MORE)

Viola Ventura 1/30/2018 1:28pm

Little Bo Johnson

Here at Viola Ventura we're capable of removing any kind of wreckage from any kind of place. Our ship is currently being refueled for the trip. We will arrive in 20 to 30 hours....(READ MORE)

USS Bizzle 1/25/2018 8:54am

Ronald Baldwin

Bizzle is here to run ish...(READ MORE)

Alis Gloriae 1/25/2018 4:53am


Captain's Log: 1/25/18 Currently on our way to Oslo to receive repairs. All cargo-workers involved in the sandwich incident have been sacked. Have sent an official apology out. Veedle...(READ MORE)

Shining Machine 1/24/2018 8:18pm

Ricky VII

- .... .- -. -.- / -.-- --- ..- / ... --- / -- ..- -.-. .... / ..-. --- .-. / -.-- --- ..- .-. / .... . .-.. .--. / .-. --- -... --- - / ..-. .- -.-. . / ... - --- .--. / - .... . .-. . / .. ... / -. --- / .-. . .- ... --- -. / - --- / ..-. .-.. -.-- / ..-. --- .-. . ...- . .-. / -.-- --- ..- / ... .. .-.. .-.. -.-- / .-. --- -... --- - / ..-. .- -.-. . / ... - --- .--. / --- .... / ... - --- .--. / - .... . / -- --- ..- -. - .- .. -. ... / .- .-. . / .--- ..- ... - / ... --- / ...- . .-. -.-- /...(READ MORE)

The Chiron 1/22/2018 5:41am

Wind Ghosts

22/01 - Delivery successful, no major incidents to report. Cargo has been taken off ship by handlers. On our way back to home base...(READ MORE)

Nemesis 1/20/2018 2:47pm


This cat is wanted dead or alive, so that's how I'll deliver it!...(READ MORE)

Steel Aurora 1/19/2018 10:34am


the north koreans are getting a little upsetti at the lack of confetti i would have gotten the fuel by now but im duct taped to the bow........(READ MORE)

Night Pigeon 1/15/2018 5:09am

Dvorak Iahdl

Just accepted a job so I guess I’m taking flight....(READ MORE)

The Flying Captain 1/14/2018 6:23am


Free confetti...(READ MORE)

Solstice 1/12/2018 12:38am


Finally loaded and leaving Thailand. The Solstice will be headed to New York where we have the most peculiar drop off instructions. Under any dumpster. What on earth could the buyer be doing that he has the free time to check under every dumpster in New York City. But who am I to argue?...(READ MORE)

Der Puce Wal 1/11/2018 3:10am

DeMarcus J. Tyree II

Der Puce Wal ist betriebsbereit und bessere Tage liegen vor uns! Capt. D.J Tyree II is ready and willing to transport any and all gadgets, thingamajigs, doodads, whatsits, and gizmos no matter how dangerous or bizarrely worded. However, under NO circumstance will the honorable captain be liable to transport gubbins or ROUS....(READ MORE)