SHIP'S LOG:

The Metataxi

Rachel Innocence 11/13/2024 11:12pm

"I don't think there's anything in that black bag for me," I said to the dry cleaner.

@Runa SecretTradition, @Rita Pearl, and @Ryung Brightness, all received such heroic items, befitting their status. Magic widsom cloaks and impenetrable shields. Me, I'm not even an officer, and this was only my first mission.

"But you've got one thing they haven't got," said the dry cleaner.

"What's that?" I asked.

"Humility. And a child-like wonder. Two! Two things they haven't got. And so for you, my dear..."

The dry cleaner pulled a long, sheer wrap shawl out of her bag and placed it over my bare shoulders.

And the darkness around us faded away.

Ryung Brightness 7/21/2024 11:10pm

My crystalline tactical shell renders me invisible. And impervious.

@Rita Pearl's hounds point. @Runa SecretTradition discovers.

I assess the threat.

And vanquish it.

Runa SecretTradition 3/30/2024 12:56pm

I move as fast as thought. Can it be said to truly be movement?

I traverse great distances, but it is not I who moves, it is the world around me.

Such is the power of the Infinity Jumpsuit.

I explore that which Belphang and Perlatz uncover.

Rita Pearl 12/6/2023 11:08pm

I wear the Cloak of Knowledge, and hold the Scepter of Vision.

Behold my brilliance! And I see all from my throne atop the sacred mountain.

Belphang! Perlatz! My Hounds of Wisdom! Fly now to the reaches of my kingdom and show me where my light does not yet shine.

Mrs. Krause 8/28/2023 10:09pm

Oh who could it be now?

Actually, I'm kidding. Everyone has their time, and my husband and I get to every one, in time.

Everyone appreciates a bit of personal service. Which is why it's a dry cleaners -- when there's cultural reference for it. For instance, with the Ne' Breem, no clothes! So instead it's more of spa where they have the silicon barnacles nibbled away. Or the zyyzyyzyyk, inhabiting several superpostions at once, they love reharmonization complexes.

For those who know what they are, however, a dry cleaners can represent certain feelings of safety and contentment, while not being overly intimidating. A dry cleaner's is usual pretty bare bones... old linoleum, wood paneling on a cheap counter, maybe even a folding chair and a stain on the office tile ceiling.

But you know they're going to make you cleaner. They're going to get out the stain. They're going to press. They might even repair, and alter.

And that smell. The olfactory cue is a big part of it.

So how exactly am I going to help these customers today, I wonder.

Reema White Antelope 5/24/2023 11:56pm

"All quiet," said Ran Pleasing.

Yeah, too quiet.

"What was that, Captain?"

"I didn't say anything," I responded.

Not that the shadow sea inside of these truly gargantuan statues wasn't already a silent ocean. We hadn't seen another giant moth since we learned to run with our lights out. But there didn't seem to be anything else moving, or making sound, or alive in any way in these pitch black depths.

The utter stillness had never seemed so sinister.

"What was that, Captain?" asked Ran Pleasing again.

"Brace for impact. Alert the crew," I told Ran Pleasing.

"Captain?"

"Now, Pleasing!"

And It was then when the silence and the darkness and the stillness enfolded us.

Runa SecretTradition 2/8/2023 11:48pm

"What am I looking at here, Runa?" Rita asked.

This wasn't fantastical or mythological or remarkable at all.

"A dry cleaners?" I respond. "There's a counter, with a cash register, and a metal rack with a hanger hanging from it."

"Yes, I can see that," Replied Rita. "What's it doing... here? Inside a dusty tomb inside a crack in a mountain-sized statue?"

It did certainly seem out of place.

"Well we could just ask for assistance," said Rachel Innocence, walking up to an old tarnished hand bell near the register on the counter.

Rachel lifted her hand.

"Noooooooooooo!" I cried. Everything moved in slow motion.

... ... ...

ding!

Rita Pearl 11/7/2022 11:46pm

"Looks like another of the G types," Ryung Brightness says. She's been categorizing the different kinds of desiccated remains we've been finding. She's up to J.

Like the others, this one is in its own alcove. Like a museum piece. The G-types are especially tall -- almost 11 feet, draped in a thin cloak, four arms hanging at its side. Giant empty eye sockets and a mouth full of fangs.

"Any artifacts?" I ask. Really hoping one of them has dropped a wallet or a set of keys or a guidebook or something.

"No," Ryung Brightness replies. "Only dust."

"Ok, let's keep moving."

Our group continues down the tunnel, lighting up the path with our headlamps and flashlights. It's been feeling more like a catacombs the farther we go.

Ryung Brightness signals for a halt. We all freeze, weapons ready. There is light ahead in the tunnel. She calls off a pair to move towards it.

We all wait in silence. Fingers on triggers.

"All clear," she calls. "But you're going to want to take a look at this."

Runa SecretTradition 8/18/2022 11:57pm

"Ryung Brightness, you take point. Rachel Innocence, you stay at our six and make sure nobody wanders off."

Rita Pearl sure knew what she was doing, and that was fine with me. As an anthropologist (and one specializing in pseudoscience at that) I had no experience in leading people through dangerous situations. I could barely make to the libary and back without sustaining some minor injury. And I certainly didn't come onboard the Metataxi with any kind of "team."

"Alright, your team's ready," Rita said to me, "and this is your expedition. Lead away!"

"Look Rita," I said, "I'll think we'll be better off with you in charge. Why don't we just... keep walking down this rather large passageway, make sure we don't fall down any holes, and keep our torches trained ahead of us, above us, and to each side, so we can see what's around us. Sound ok?"

Rita seemed to get the message.

"That's a lot of light," she said. "You're not worried about attracting any attention? Seems like lights were the first thing that got us in trouble here."

She had a point. If the outer caverns were infested by giant moths, then what might inhabit these interior tunnels? This particular tunnel seemed manmade... or intentionally carved by some intelligent species at least, just like the giant statues we were within. But there was no denying it was also abandoned, and potentially the hunting ground for who knows what kind of--

"Aw, I'm just messing with you, Runa," Rita said. "We need to see where we're going, don't we? C'mon, let's head out."

Reema White Antelope 6/10/2022 9:14pm

“Docking clamps locked, Captain.”

“Thank you, Ran Pleasing” I said.

Somehow all our creeping around in the dark led us to an entrance. Something between a big porthole and a church. A huge gothic slit carved into in the alabaster walls. @Runa SecretTradition demanded we go in. @Rita Pearl demanded we stay out. I decided in favor of our mandate, to explore the unexpected.

"That is not our mandate at all." said Rita. "We're on a simple trade route. We move boxes of tissue paper and instant ramen. THAT is our mandate."

Yeah, well. A captain's gotta do what a captain's gotta do. And Rita didn't have a better option than continuing to bump around in the dark and wait for our rations to run out.

"Runa and Rita. Prepare your teams."

Good thing we have plenty of ramen.