SHIP'S LOG:

Golden Stone

Squawky McWaddles 1/1/2018 9:02pm

The Golden Stone is so c-c-c-cold they had to get PENGUINS to work on it! That's where I come in -- Pvt. First Class Squawky McWaddles here! Yes sir! Me and the other Private Penguins do all the odd jobs on the refrigeration decks--running as fast as we can and slipping and sliding as we make sharp turns, carrying great stacks of dirty dishes piled high and oh nooooooooooooooo!!!! There they go!!!!!!!!! CRASH!!!!!

Boatswain Bob 12/27/2017 11:08pm

Ding! Ding! Ding! Hear that ringing? It's me, Boatswain Bob, and one of my jobs is keeping time on the Golden Stone by ringing the ship's golden bell. It's solid gold, naturally, so Mr. Northwind makes sure to keep a cool wind blowing on it all the time. Otherwise it would crack!

When I'm not ringing the bell, you can find me running 'round the ship pointing out things to Mr. Northwind that need to be kept cold. Golden Fleeces! Sandwiches! Tuna salad! Everything needs to be kept COLD COLD COLD!

Mr. Northwind 12/20/2017 9:22pm

Blowers blowing at full blast, Bosun! Wind chill chilling on high! Air flow icy! Keep passages clear! Malted Menthol shakes for all on the Mezzanine at midnight! Frozen sunshine on the Promenade! Wear your mufflers!

Jack Schnee 12/15/2017 5:18pm

My brothers and I have hitched a ride south on the Golden Stone. As snowmen living above the arctic circle, we love this time of year as it allows us to venture out and see the world, and the refrigerated containers on the Golden Stone are exactly the kind of transportation we require! Mr. Icicle has made us very comfortable, giving us thin blankets and very large blocks of gold to sleep on, and brings us Frosted Flakes to eat. Because you know what they say: it's about the journey, not the destination!

Eugene Icicle 12/10/2017 9:17pm

Eugene here! Refrigeration Specialist on the Golden Stone. I keep things frosty on the ship. We specialize in all things made of gold: gold bars, Feng Shui gold ingots, golden stars, golden skulls, Yuan Bao for Wealth Luck, golden idols, golden dog and cat statuettes, even big golden fountain statues of boys holding umbrellas and peeing. I keep everything cold to make sure the gold doesn't crack, which, if you've ever had anything made of solid gold, you know is a big problem.

We're the first choice for anyone needing to move solid gold, but when times are lean, we fall back on popsicles and ice cream. Which is a harder sell this time of year. Still, there I am in my snowman suit, loading and unloading the reefer units whenever we make port. Got some extra iced novelties that need moving? Maybe down to the southern hemisphere? Post a job today and we'll scoop it up!

Rosalina (Rosie) 12/7/2017 3:11pm

I find it really exciting to be piloting a whole air transport, so it's a shame that I have to work part-time. I work part-time because of school. Shipping gold can be really heavy, and the cool air doesn't make it better. The cool air is so that the gold doesn't melt or crack.