SHIP'S LOG:

Araceli

Jimmy Three-hands 4/6/2018 8:03pm

It is too much to be too long anywhere. So I sent away to an advertisement in the back of one of my comic books--Miraculous Mummy--and received this fantastic Do-it-yourself Airship Kit in the mail. It is truly wonderful, and with merely some airplane glue and monofilament tape, I have constructed this marvelous Ship of the Air!

It is time to go explorering. Who's who? How much? and what's the answer? The propellers are propelling, and the gas bag lifting. Full steam ahead! First stop: Great Mama Two-hands, to thank her for the pies.

Great Mama Two-hands 3/20/2018 10:07pm

Well I had a dream about JImmy Three-hands eatin' my pies! It was a wonderful dream. Would you like me to tell you about it? It was a beautiful summer morning at Jimmy Three-hands' cabin, and the mist was on the dew and the wild strawberries were ripe on their little vines, and the great translucent emptiness of Kiakiadori sat in the pond and rose up high into the sky, filling it with the dark void of the universe.

Jimmy Three-hands was just about to stick one of his three long tongues into one of my three warm pies when he had an idea.

"Wouldn't it be nice to have some fresh ice cream to eat with my pies?," he thought. "Kiakiadori could get me that ice cream, because he holds the entire universe inside him, and there's bound to be ice cream in there somewhere."

So Jimmy Three-hands walked on down to the pond and looked up at the giant Kiakiadori, which some people say looks like a slug, and other people say looks like a snake, but it's hard to say because it's transparent clear see-through and is filled with nothing but stars and space and nebula. Kiakiadori towered over Jimmy Three-hands.

"Hey Kiakiadori! I heard from Oyster Ray that you don't have the real universe inside you--just a finite baby microverse. At least that's what Oyster Ray told me."

The Kiakiadori shivered, and the space inside him shimmied.

"I told him I knew you had the real universe inside you and that I could prove it. All I need is to show him some evidence. Like, I don't know, how about a pint of ice cream? If you can give me a pint of ice cream from the universe inside you, then I'll show Oyster Ray and that'll be that! Whaddaya say?"

Jimmy Three-hands wrung his three hands looked up at Kiakiadori with his three eyes. He tried his best to look serious and honest.

Kiakiadori puckered a portion of its amorphous outer surface and turned it inward, bending the dimensions of spacetime and connecting with an ice cream stand somewhere in the universe where the workers wore white paper hats and the tiles were clean and it smelled like fresh sugar and milk, and returned with a pint of ice cream, which it put into Jimmy Three-hands' three hands.

"Thank you Kiakiadori! Thank you very much!" said Jimmy Three-hands, and he walked back to his cabin.

Jimmy Three-hands ate the ice cream and the pie. And now there's a new baby microverse inside of Jimmy Three-hands.


Oh don't you worry. I told you it's just a dream!

Great Mama Two-hands 1/29/2018 7:56pm

Oh you're very kind, Leila. I'm just sure Jimmy Three-hands will love those pies. You have a safe trip to Shark Country. They say those sharks are loud, and it can be a little scary. If you get scared you can take a big whiff of my pies and I'm sure it will calm you right down. And don't let Jimmy Three-hands scare you either, when he looks at you with those three big green eyes of his.

Leila L. Laguardia 1/28/2018 8:16pm

Seems like this is just the job for our maiden voyage! Don't worry, your pies are safe in Leila Laguardia's hands. The Araceli'll get these pies to their destination lickety-split!
Over and out!

Great Mama Two-hands - 1/26/2018 8:47pm

Job claimed by Leila L. Laguardia 2018-01-28 20:16:44

Oh my pies! My pies! They’re ever so warm and fresh. Blueberry and Marionberry and Rhubarb. They’re speaking to me from the windowsill. Shhhh... listen. They are saying “Take us to the home of Jimmy Three-hands! He will hold us with his three hands, and look at us with his three eyes, and taste us with his three tongues! Oh do take us to the home of Jimmy Three-hands!”

But Great Mama Two-hands is old. I can’t take these pies to the home of Jimmy Three-hands! I need help.

If you can help me, you can find me at Great Mama Two-hands Cooking Academy, 22 Drury Lane, Northbundle, Idofrod, NTE. Jimmy Three-hands lives in the South Shakes, east of the Big Nose river in Shark Country. But oh do hurry. These pies are cooling off fast! And they’re ever so much better when they’re warm.